Oftentimes it surprises my clients when I tell them…”You deserve to live your life. You can have your own hobbies, interests, and friends. You can go to the store, etc, whenever you want.” Many times I get a similar response….”Wait…. What?? I can do these things? And I don’t have to ASK??”
Some have been so conditioned by the abuser that it comes as a complete shock when they realize that they do not have to ask permission before making a decision or doing something on their own. I love the moment when I hear their disbelief turn into a new -found determination. 
“You are not the darkness you endured. You are the light that refused to surrender.” ~~ John Mark Green
Her Warcry 